You say you're tired of her
and you've found a faster life.
You're having trouble
going home to her
when you get off work at night.
You say your dining out with friends
won't be until late.
While she sits home
with the children you fathered
and tolerates
Now, wasn't that the same little gal
you swore a while back
you'd spend your whole life through?
Shortly after that,
didn't she hang it up for
life to marry you?
Hey, are you afraid that
the boys at the office
will no longer call you stud?
Well, the secretary's an alligator,
shoes gotten in your blood
Better mind your better
homes and gardens
And take the kids out too
And take her home
some candy and say
Baby, I love you
Now I'm not sayin' that she'll forgive
Or even make amends
But you're about half smart
and you better start
And that might just get you back in
Hadn't you heard that that
door swings both ways,
my friend?
She can be just as gone
The best deal you ever had,
you ever had, you ever had
Is waitin' out there at home
You say you're gettin' caught up early
You're cheatin' out of life
Well, you also said that
you'd be a millionaire
But the time you's 25 didn't make it
Better mind your better
homes and gardens
Take the kids to the zoo
Spend the day with a PTA
She might think that's cool
No, I'm not saying that she'll forgive
And that you're right back in her world
She ain't gonna flip
But you've got it licked if she smiles
Cause she's a good old girl
Better mind your better
homes and gardens
Take the kids out too,
and take her home some
flowers and say,
Baby, I love you.
I'm not saying that you are.